The Biggest Lie

What's the biggest lie you've ever been told?


For me I don't know if it was my high school boyfriend telling me that he wasn't cheating on me... or my best friend telling me that she wasn't having an affair with said boyfriend. Or maybe it was that my college years would be the best years of my life. Or even that my degree would matter...


But in reality I think the biggest lie I was ever told is that you're going to meet the perfect person.



If you would have asked 15-year-old Marvyl to describe who she was going to marry, I can bet you anything that it's probably the polar opposite of the person I'm actually going to marry. Well, maybe except for how handsome he is...that's definitely on point


But the ideal person that I created the Sim version of for years and years, doesn't exist. The person that all my friends and mentors and TV shows told me that I would eventually find isn't real. Because the truth of the matter is that when you find the person you're going to spend presumably forever with, reality comes up and slaps you in the face and shows you that the perfect person you were expecting is only that... a person.


And the truly awful thing about people is that we suck. Boys, girls, all of us...were awful things. We get mad, we get angry, we're messy, we're lazy, we're selfish, we want our alone time while simultaneously needing someone to constantly interact with...we're addicted to our phones, addicted to our games, addicted to food and drinks that are really awful for us.


There are so many things that can be wrong with a single person that when you're growing up that should lead you to believe the chances are, the human you're going to be stuck with has at least a few of those things going for them.


And guess what? You've got a few of those things going for you too. Finding someone to spend forever with doesn't mean finding a perfect person. It means finding a person that you can tolerate, and who can tolerate you. It means finding someone who will take all be terrible, awful things in the human part of you and still think that you're perfect. (While knowing that deep down inside you really love Carly Rae Jepson songs and that you're probably going to skip your workout tonight to eat smores that are even cooked because you don't have the patience to wait for the microwave to finish).


And you're going to realize that the person you love drives you absolutely crazy sometimes because they just have to finish this quest before doing that thing that you asked them to do, and that there really going to want to sit on the couch in their boxers even if you have company coming over and you're going to have to have a real life argument about wearing pants.



But at the end of the day you know that you found the person you're supposed to be with because they're not perfect and you're not perfect but you make each other better. You love all those wonderful things about each other did make up for all those really awful things about human beings.



So the biggest lie that I was ever told was that I will find the perfect person. But the truth I found was that I found a wonderfully human person that has good days and bad days and wonderful things about them and terrible things about them.



I wish 15-year-old Marvyl knew that she shouldn't have been looking for a perfect person. But I guess it all worked out in the end, because I found a whole lot of people that I thought were perfect.

Thank goodness I didn't end up with the perfect person, because I found MY person.