The dress didn't matter

I'm a planner.

I like to plan ahead, and plan meticulously, especially if I'm nervous.

Which I was.

These were our engagement pictures, after all, and I knew (and Eric did not seem to understand) that these pictures would be the face of every single wedding thing we did up to our wedding day and that they would be plastered all over everything and I would have to look at them day in and day out.

Needless to say, I was definitely freaking out over the entire situation.

I hate being in front of the camera, and I take every picture and pick apart all my imperfections like my sudden double chin if I hit the wrong angle or my mis-shaped elbows from all the fractures I incurred as a wreckless, clumsy child or my awkwardly shaped knees that I ruined playing soccer. My teeth, my hair, nothing is safe from my scrutiny.

So I tortured Eric for weeks, dragging him to every store I could think of that might have the right outfit.

I eventually settled on a teal dress that matched the shirt we bought, and a floral print dress because, you know, that's just who I am.


The day of I was a complete mess. I felt terrible, hadn't slept, and had so much to do before the shoot.

While I was getting my nails done, Eric was instructed to get his outfits together and then we would get our hair done before the shoot.

When I got home, I was surprised to find that apparently we had not bought the teal shirt that I thought we had (although I SWEAR we did) and the situation exploded into a full-on Marvyl-break down.

We did not have matching outfits, and we had no alternatives! (You know, except for the 500 other dresses and outfits I own...#firstworldproblems) And I just lost it. To the point of almost cancelling.

But in his eternal patience and calmness, Eric talked me down from the fashion crisis ledge and we headed out in mis-matching outfits to the salon.


I felt better once my hair was done, because every time I leave Hair Peace I feel like I can take over the world.

Isn't it funny how hair can change your entire outlook on life? Not even the cut or color or style, just someone pampering you for an hour and telling you how awesome you are, and you come out with hair that looks like it belongs in a shampoo commercial and you just feel GREAT.


So I'd calmed down, but I was still nervous about the camera's focus being on my face, which conveniently was broken out and orange because I had the notion to attempt contouring with the first Sephora purchase in my life. It's definitely NOT as easy as they make it look on that paint-by-numbers card they sell you on.


But as soon as we got there, Joe and Kathleen made me feel perfectly comfortable.

In true Marvyl fashion, as soon as we started were in the train I was geeking out over the history of the car, and then a bird pooped in my hair. A bird. In a train car. POOPED in my hair.

Because, life and stuff.

At that point, I couldn't help but laugh because that's just how things roll in the Marvyl Hurricane.


I honestly couldn't believe how relaxed they made us feel, and how much fun it was. They really took their time and made sure we were enjoying ourselves, and that we felt like freaking models.

It was spectacular to see them work, and I laughed so hard the whole time.

It didn't hurt that I had Eric by my side, that goofball.


By the end of it, I'd forgotten all about the weeks of stress I felt leading up to it.


Because I knew that now I wouldn't just have a bunch of engagement pictures. I'd have a whole story, and a lifetime of memories from just a few hours.

Joe and Kathleen are true artists, and incredibly genuine and fun people.

They dealt with my crazy bride requests, and made a frightening experience so much fun.


AND THEN I GOT TO SEE ONE OF THE PICTURES.

ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?

WHO ARE THOSE PEOPLE?

IS THIS REAL LIFE?

*SOBS*

Words can't even fully explain how I felt when I saw this picture. I wanted to cry but I couldn't believe that this picture happened in real life. 

They are not photographers. They are straight up MAGICIANS. 

I actually got chills down my back when I saw this photograph, and I WAS THERE THE WHOLE TIME. 

I can't stop looking at it and freaking out about the fact that I have MORE coming. 

This one picture would have been enough for me. 

Because HOLY. COW. 

That is art, people. That is a story in a photograph. 

When I saw this, I thought 1) I love that boy. Look at how cute my boy is. 2) LOOK AT THIS PICTURE OHMYGOD 3)Seriously though, my boy is handsome. 

And you know what I didn't think about?

That teal dress, and his mismatching suit. The bird poop. The rush to get ready. 

I just thought about how I love that boy, and I love this picture, and I love JOPHOTO. 

Because in the end, the dress didn't matter. 

In the end, it was who was beside me and the wonderful story that did. 

And I think that was an important lesson to learn before the big day. 

If you want to drool over more JOPHOTO you can find them here. 

Or you can obsess over their pins here.

You can follow my blog board on Pinterest and I'll add more pictures as they come! Follow Marvyl's board To Be Triscritti on Pinterest.

The Price on a Head

Ok, people.

Let's take a minute to talk about wedding food.

If you're getting married, you have to feed people. Food is one of the best parts of any party, and it can make or break your wedding night by being super memorable for being great or terrible.

And I'm super proud to be working for an amazing local catering company that is family owned and operated, and one that values providing high quality food and service.

(Not just a shameless self-plug, but also the truth.)

But I'm always surprised when I help couples plan their dream menu and then I get this reaction when I send them the price:
 

Girl, I been there. It freaking sucks paying for a wedding. I feel ya. But let's break this down...


Let's say you go to Mickey D's and you get your Mac on.

You right. That burger IS super delicious. And the best part? You paid around nine bucks for that meal. Mmmm. THOSE FRIES THO.

So now you're planning a wedding, and you have 150 guests.

You want really nice food, served by a caterer who will set everything up, cook everything and make it delicious, serve your guests all night, tear everything down and clean everything up. Oh, you also want them to provide plates, silverware, glasses, linens, and staff.

You're going to tell me you want to plan a food budget of $10 per person?


If you expect McDonalds quality, you can plan for $10/person.

I'm not saying it can't be done. I know it can. There are plenty of caterers that can offer you $10 a head. But it will be low quality, on plastic plates, with plastic forks, and no service.


I understand that everyone has a budget, and if food isn't a priority for you, then you can definitely make it work for that much.

But don't walk into a consultation with a champagne taste on a beer budget.

If you're dreaming of a beef and chicken buffet with the works, expect that it's going to come in at over $10 a head.
 


You also need to be careful of people selling that price point. You need to consider that you might end up renting flatware, plates, glasses, linens, and other supplies you might need that are included in higher estimates and quotes.

There are ways to cut down on costs, and most caterers will definitely work with you to aim for your budget.

Just remember to be prepared for that price tag that is attached to your Big Day Dreams, and that goes for all your vendors.

When you're looking for a caterer, you need to look for someone who can not only provide good food, but someone you know will be able to pull of your event with style, class, and quality.

Speaking of which, that's the name of our game.

You can find out more about Bradford Catered Events by checking out www.bradfordevents.com

And you can follow them on their new Pinterest board: Visit Bradford Catered Events's profile on Pinterest.

Living in Sin with a Safety Pin

One of the first comments I got after I got engaged was, "Congratulations! Now you won't be living in sin!"

Living in the Bible-belt, you pretty much get used to this look when you tell someone you're living with a boy before you got married:

And usually, I just roll on not caring about the silent judging and whatnot because that's how I was raised.

But recently, I saw a really heartbreaking plea for understanding from a girl I went to highschool with, asking her friends and family to understand her personal decision to live with her boyfriend before getting married, which then proceeded to her getting Bible-bashed by so called friends/family.

 


Nooooo Facebook! Why do you have to do this to me?? Now I have to get my soap box out!



There are about a million and one reasons I chose to move in with Eric before we got married. So many, I don't even know where to start.

For one, my hippy parents raised me to be an independent, rational human being who made my own choices based on my own morals, beliefs, and situations.

Also, we're both mature, financially stable adults with careers and degrees and pasts that have provided us with the experiences we need to, for the most part, be real people. (That's not to say that we don't have some weeks where we eat pizza 4/7 days of the week.)

People often say 50% of marriages end in divorce, which now isn't accurate at all due to the fact that people are marrying later, birth control, and marriage less reliant on situational circumstances instead of an actual relationship.

But when I hear people say they couldn't imagine living with someone before they were married or saying what a terrible idea it is, it just sounds ridiculous to me.


First of all, you really find out who someone is when you live with them. You find out how clean (or in my case, how messy) a person is, you find out how they sleep, how they wake up, how they spend their free time when they're not with you...all that stuff that is normally a surprise if you wait until marriage is found out in time to GTFO if you need to.

You also figure out if you can work with that person in real-life situations. Can you handle bills together? Can you handle chores together? Can you handle those days where one of you had the worst day ever and is just stomping around the house?

Living together most certainly comes with downsides, including the potential to get trapped in a relationship based off a lease and a dog and people entering into decisions too early, but that is something for each individual couple to consider and communicate through.


People who traditionally waited until marriage group up in a time without cell phones or the internet, and an entirely different dating scene to begin with.

You'd talk to someone at school, or work, maybe after school and on weekends. Now, you're in CONSTANT contact with your significant other. Literally, you have to find someone in this world that you can stand to talk to all day, all night.

While I don't think that there is anything wrong with waiting until marriage at all, I think that no matter what you choose it shouldn't be judged by anyone-especially reasoning based off of archaic context of what relationships are and how they function.

We live in a progressive world, and world where people should be allowed to make the choices that are right for them, not anyone else.


If you want to live together, live together. You want to wait, wait. But you should be supportive of the people you love no matter. That's what is important.


Do what you want, and love everyone. And if anyone tries to tell you differently, then screw 'em!

 



P.S. DREW CAREY.